Now Serving Nobody Shirt | Funny Deadpan Gag Gift Tee
ANY 3 TEES FOR $90 — AUTOMATIC AT CHECKOUT
The Situation
Now serving nobody. Take a number anyway. The queue is not moving and it never was.
A cream deli counter placard with a teal headline and an amber band across the bottom still politely asking you to take a number.
Why this isn't a mall tee
- Designed in-house — not a mall-rack reprint
- Soft ringspun cotton, 4.2 oz — side-seamed, pre-shrunk, true unisex fit
- Three colourways: black, navy, dark grey heather
Fit
Unisex retail fit, true to size. Between sizes? Size up for a relaxed look, size down for fitted.
Size chart (inches)
S 28 long / 18 wide · M 29 / 20 · L 30 / 22 · XL 31 / 24 · 2XL 32 / 26 · 3XL 33 / 28. Measured flat.
Shipping
Ships in 10 business days. Free shipping on every US order.
Perfect for
Service industry survivors, front desk veterans, and anyone whose line never moves.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out. Tumble dry low. Do not iron the print.
✓ Secure checkout · ✓ 30-day returns · ✓ Ships in 10 business days · ✓ Free shipping on every order
Size & Fit
| Size | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Length (in) | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 |
| Width (in) | 18 | 20 | 22 | 24 | 26 | 28 |
Measured flat, garment laid down. Length is collar seam to hem.
| Fabric | 4.2 oz ringspun cotton |
| Build | Side-seamed, pre-shrunk |
| Fit | True unisex retail |
| Shipping | Ships in 10 business days |
| Care | Cold wash inside out, tumble dry low |




